Self Healing is an experience to Love Self and others, to Love Self is to allow the right people into your experiences.
Self Suffering is an experience to Hate Self and others, to hate Self is to resist the wrong people into your experiences. Accepting the wrong people into your experiences only makes it worse. Understand why you're resisting them and this brings in the right people.
When we hate ourselves we feel lonely, separated, disconnected and empty inside. Bad things happen , when you feel lonely!
We're living in the dark, why we feel lonely!
Hatred hurts and is painful, Love pleases and is Joyful.